[-INFO-]asiana [-control-]Sign my guestbook [-blogrings-]Random Ramblings of Asian Americans [-calendar-]
|
Monday, June 01, 2009 Gloom and DoomI have always said that I lead a charmed life. I'm usually questioned as to what I really mean by that... I've never had to go hungry, or cold. I may not always get what I want, but I've always gotten what I need. My parents expected me to work hard work, after they had already laid out a nice paved path for me to travel. I really couldn't ask for a better life. Possibly because of this, I possess a sort of naivete when it comes to such things as death, violence and the like. You know...reality. I tend to lead a rather optimistic outlook on life and human nature. Scary enough, I think that people..and the world are inherently good. I'm beginning to wonder if this is good for me. Last week, a bartender at the local martini bar was found dead. I happened to be working a promo at the bar the day it happened. I've worked every other weekend at this bar for 4 months. I had no idea who the bartender was. So I felt nothing. While everyone around me was fighting back tears, I felt absolutely nothing. Just some distant feeling of apathy. You can argue that I didn't know the guy. But...that apathy is something I feel anytime I hear that someone has passed. Be it my grandfather. My grandmother. I've been very lucky to not have to experience much death in my life. Even with the grandparents...they all died in China. I didn't go back for the funeral services. In all of my almost 29 years, I've only been to one funeral. I count myself very lucky. I know I am very lucky. But it does leave me feeling like I am stunted emotionally in this area. A group of my co-workers went on a cruise this past weekend. I got a call yesterday that one of them had been attacked by her boyfriend. He locked her in the room and beat her up. They had only been dating for a few months. He held a pillow over her head and told her that no one would miss her if she never show up to meet the group. That it could be hours before anyone would come looking for her. That she deserved this. I can't seem to wrap my arms around everything. Mostly because I know both of them. Mostly because I tend to see the good in people. Mostly because I can't understand how someone can do such a thing. I'm not sure if my inability to grasp all the negativity of reality is good or bad. Do I want to be more worldly? At the expense of thinking the world is a dark and gloomy place? Do I want to be less shocked by the news of death or violence? Does this make me less whole of a person?
Thursday, May 28, 2009 When Magic happens...I have never been much of a sports person. Both in participation and spectatorship. I used to swim in middle school. I was never the best swimmer, but didn't suck enough to be the worst. It was something I really enjoyed. Then when it was time to follow the natural progression onto the high school swim team... my irrational fear of heights decided it wasn't going to happen. When in middle school, regulation would allow me to dive off the side of the pool instead of the block. But in high school, the rules change. After an entire practice spent standing on the block to will myself to dive head first into the shallow pool, I decided maybe swimming wasn't for me after all. Instead, I played tennis in high school. Well, "play" is a very loose term. I owned a racquet, tennis skirt and traveled with the team. I even had a snazzy bag with my name embroidered on it. Beyond that, tennis was more of means to socialize with my friends than a competitive sport. I did gladly join my friends at the boys soccer games. Let's face it...soccer guys are hot. Even in my little small hometown....hot. Outside of that, my sporting relationship was limited to running the board at our local radio station as they aired the high school baseball games. (who knew I'd take that and turn radio into a career...) I still credit that experience with my knowledge of the top and the bottom of innings. Awesome...I know. By the time I made it to college, I had abandoned all guises of trying to be athletic permanently. Let's face it, if it hadn't happened by the time I'm 18...it's never going to happen. On my rare weekends off, I made it to a football game or two. Back then, we had Dante Culpepper and was actually a decent team. Not so much the case in recent years. I let Kim-to-the-E convince me on occasion to join her at UCF baseball games. Promise of peanuts, pretzels and other game foods could convince me to act interested in the sport...at least till the bottom of the 5th. So post college, I'd catch a few Gator games here and there, perhaps a Superbowl or two. I'll even meet people out specifically to watch the Gators play. (I'm a Gator by proxy). But...I wouldn't say I'm really a fan. Then one day, I get free tickets to an Orlando Magic basketball game. And so starts my 4-year love affair with the team... Since that day, I have put quite a few Magic games under my belt. I own a jersey (and jacket). I know the players names. I recognize their faces. I even know their numbers. Did I mention I have an autographed ball? (an awesome gift from a friend) I have a Dwight Howard bobble head. I have a favorite player. Somewhere over the course of the years, I've become a FAN.
Jameer Nelson...aka #14...aka my favorite player Now don't misunderstand me... I am not a fan of basketball. I am a fan of the Orlando Magic. I don't understand the technical speak. I don't know the players' positions. I don't know stats. I don't really care if they win unless I'm physically at the games. But then... they make it to the Eastern Conference Finals... Suddenly, I'm watching Sportscenter (willingly!), reading Sport Illustrated and other journals, I'm getting indigestion, shaky hands and racing heart over the suspense of the game, I boo the refs, I'm using techincal jargon... I've become a real FAN. So now...I'm biting my nails as they play Game 5 against Cleveland...but they lead the series 3-1. We need just one more win and we are in the Finals. FINALS. We haven't gotten there in 14 years. (yes, I'm even referring to them in the possessive. I've become one of them...) My next mission, after they clench the Eastern Conference title (power of positive thinking)...GET TICKETS FOR THE FINALS!!!!! Now I just have to figure out how I'm going to make that happen... GOOO MAGIC!!!!!
Friday, April 24, 2009 paradise...Leaving for Turks and Caicos in the morning. I should be excited, but the stress of work has me feeling blah. It's a working vacation in paradise. Hopefully, I can destress and at least enjoy the vacation part of this trip. Just need a moment to stop feeling so overwhelmed. Monday, April 13, 2009 I take compliments wellHB: You're one in a billion Me: So there's 2 of me in China HB: and one in India.
Monday, March 23, 2009 When things go KA-PUT!I think there's a negative energy force surrounding my house. In the past 18 months or so, these electrical items have died....
and most recently...my washer. The very bad thing about it being the washer is that it created the Great Flood of 2009 in my house. The very good thing about it happening on Friday is that I was actually home, albeit 45 minutes before I realized the water was inching dangerously close to the couch. I'm an unconventional laundry doer. I often start the washer and leave for work, or go to bed. Had the washer died on any other day, my house would no longer exist...9 hours of running water...forget my house, the local water supply would be practically depleted. I am sure of it. But with a rare combination of jet lag and intolerance to caffeine, I was still awake at 3am... to clean up the whole mess. One of the great things (in theory) about renting is that I got to call my property manager at 3am to explain the situation, and then go to bed worry-free knowing that one phone call would mean things will get done. Mind you, I ended up cleaning until almost 4, then laid awake in bed (still thanks partly to caffeine) thinking of the stupidity of the situation...and contemplating the fact that I recently put an offer on a house. Do I really want to be a home owner now? The carpet cleaners called at 9am to say they were on their way. They didn't show up till 11. But after about 45 minutes of work, my carpet was on its way to recovery. They even left their blower to dry the padding underneath. Of course, no story would be complete without a bit of irony, I came home from work yesterday to find that the blower's motor had shut down. It wouldn't turn back on even when I allowed it to cool down. Par for the course. So an appliance fixer (because I don't know what the appropriate title would be) is coming at some point today to take a look at the washer to see if it's fixable. There is a big part of me hoping that s/he will flip a switch and everything will be peachy keen. The other scenario is that the machine has reached the end of its life span and I am in need of a new one. Now why wouldn't I opt for a new one instead of wanting to keep one that could potentially go ka-put again? I haven't done laundry in over 2 weeks. I am leaving for San Fran on Thursday morning. The likelihood of me getting a new washer before Wednesday is slim. I refuse to go to a laundromat (I rent places with washer and dryers in the units for a reason)...so unless I can beg a friend to let me monopolize their washer and dryer for an evening....I will be going to San Fran with dirty laundry. There are 2 other options, of course. Buy all new clothes once I get to SF, or ask the sister to bring double of everything, so I can just borrow her clothes. In the meantime, I wonder if there is someone I can call to perform a ritual to rid my house of the bad ju ju. |
[-info-]Read my reviews [-panel-]
|
Back then, most of my sporting occurred on the dance floor of a club...
Who knew...
